I made a couple new banners btw

 >>/67093/
at some point I lost interest in all the edifying things. It's like you just don't believe in anything anymore on a subconscious level, nothing is worth learning about. I still have good days sometimes and I try to get back on track, including exposing myself to suffering like you said (which is obviously not as easy as it sounds when it's just words on a screen). Maybe it's a mistake, but I don't want to "enjoy" or be content with whatever this is, I want to be an actual person again. Somehow I lost my "self" without having ever been even close to a corporate 9 to 5 or anything like that